JimSoft Insanitarium -> Insane Stories -> A Naked Girl And Her Donkey
By Lemur

In true naked person fashion Jane decided to, SHEET! JEEZ, God, you scared me. Bloody Microsoft Office assistant barked at me. Bloody, It.., If you have a registered version of Microsoft word on the installer disk you can load up other office assistants, apart from that paperclip. Anyhow, see, I have this dog, I forget his name, but the bastard just barked at me. Now I have typed the fear I felt the stupid arse dog has lost its idea, so I now have no knowledge of why the dog was barking at me. As much as I love dogs and Microsoft Products (Slipperypete’s love of Microsoft™ products is pending a LARGE cheque deposited into Slipperypete’s bank account post haste) dogs in Microsoft products scare me stupidly. Well, more scare me stupid, not stupidly. I am getting a bad vibe from these ramblings. This story sucks arse. This is officially the worst insane story Slipperypete has ever written. NOW LOOK, I AM REFERRING TO MYSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON! Disgraceful. Utter crud. Did you know masticate means to chew and digest? I fully recommend waling up to your hearing impaired grandpa and saying “Hey Grandpa, want to masticate with be? I could really go for a session of mastication” and view their response. Please don’t kill Grandpa, and if Grandpa whips it out and you are scarred for life don’t scream lawsuit as I do at anything that goes wrong. Too much milk on my cereal? LAWSUIT. Temprature too hot? LAWSUIT! Clouds in the sky? OVERSIZED INFLATABLE CAMEL FLOATING HIGH ABOVE THE SEA WHILE HUNGRY BIRDS PICK AT THE CARCASS OF SOCIETY AND RANDOM OUTBURSTS BY INSANE PEOPLE WHO LIKE HTML AND RELATED PROGRAMMING LANGUAGES AND HAVE AN UNHEALTHY OBSESSION WITH FRICKIN’ MINI GOLF STAIN THE FABRIC OF HUMANITY DRIVE ME CRAZY! Err.. I.., I mean.., law.. suit.., that…

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